Immediately after graduating, when I took a voluntary jump into the shit-hole of entrance exams, my mind and heart were seen to be placed in juxtaposition. My heart had one key word: LIVE. My mind had another: TIME. These two words have only one thing in common. They are four-lettered. As a pragmatic human running a race called 'The faster you run, the closer your destination', I joined the herd of medical students who study until they reach a marriageable age and then don responsibilities too heavy for the shoulders which are bending with pressure of heavy books already.
Right now, I'm split against the war raging between my mind and heart. They both have valid points. My heart tells me to take a break and find time for myself and breathe, travel, read more books, write, take out that guitar from its stand and strum a few strings. My heart basically wants me to defy social parameters and live life on my own terms. Such a darling this heart is! However, I have a particularly hasslesome organ called the Brain, who is a bossy, dominant, pain-in-the-neck dictator and tells me what is advisable and what is not; and like every dictator, there's a threat which the Brain employs to make me dance to his tunes-Time. And according to this threat, I'm supposed to ignore my heart’s voice and venture into the world of MCQ books and exam forms, and reduce my life into something similar- A test with limited options, which I'm supposed to finish within a stipulated period.
Time is merely a resultant effect of the positioning of earth in the orbit, which creates an illusion of the sun rising and setting. Now you take something as simple as that, and you give it to a human, and he/she will be sure to blow it out of proportion and make it a claustrophobic constraint, holding you at gun point, and commanding you to run faster, or else threatening to leave you behind in this race. I think life would be easier if we were like fishes in the sea, they have no concept of time. They just swim and go with the flow (pun very much intended).
We all have charted out a plan for our life, where a certain age is imparted a certain task, and all these deadlines are to be matched in order to lead a wholesome, satisfied life, where your future comprises of having a stable job, a three bedroom flat with balconies, and enough bank balance to spend on luxurious whims and fancies. Why?! You have one life, you have stayed on this planet for only a little more than two decades. The first decade you barely have any memory of, the second decade you spent crafted around societal parameters. So this beginning of the third decade is where your life begins, where you take the remote and navigate your life into the path YOU want to walk on. If you let time decide everything, you will only be running until the arthritis kicks in and you end up in some old age home with buckling knees and fake teeth.
Listen to that heart sometimes. Live for yourself. I know the future is nebulous, but not everything has to be planned and executed. While you are busy planning, life will catch you off guard. Let your impulse decide at times, but don't be stupid. It is not a bollywood movie, you will have to work hard to build a secure future at the same time. You want to crack that entrance exam? You need that promotion? Well you are going to earn it, you just have to show them you deserve it. But don't skip dinner with your family, it is the only time you really get to spend with them. Don't bail out on that road trip you planned with your friends two months ago. Don't forsake that screenwriting workshop you enrolled yourself for. Your passion needs to soar.
Let your mind do the ruling, but take your heart along with you. The latter knows better. Money and stability comes complimentary with hard work, and work hard you will! However you shall enjoy this process only if you let your heart experience that adrenaline rush once in a while. Keeping your talents and desires locked away is like having a treasure trove and never using it. Don't clip your own wings. No matter how fast you run, your ultimate destination is that niche dug inside earth. Might as well live a little before that happens, won't you?
